New Jersey’s Board of Cosmetology and Hairstyling is considering a proposal to ban Brazilian bikini waxes.

Crazy right?

Apparently there were TWO women who complained of injuries sustained from wax jobs that put them in the hospital so the board is now making the serious decision. Waxing your crotch has actually always been illegal in the state but the statute wasn’t explicitly spelled. This proposal will make it blatantly clear by outright banning waxing of your genital areas. The board is set to meet, and vote on the ban on Brazilians, on April 14th.

If you live in Jersey you might want to book one before then…might be gone for a long time.

I personally find this a bit ridiculous. Ain’t no one telling me I cant wax if I want to wax. I suppose I’d just drive into NY once every 2 months to get it done. Sounds like the only logical idea to me. Or burn down where the vote will be held. That would work too.

This was a cartoon in the New York Post.

Not to be all fanatical but I want to know how a post that clearly depicts someone making a comment that implies Obama when they are shooting a MONKEY to death got passed a string of editors without anyone stopping and thinking.

I get it, the guy is clearly making light of Travis the ape that tore off a woman’s face last week…but why the stimulus bill joke then? All that you can get from this cartoon is that Obama is a crazed ape who rips peoples faces off because he’s so into this package. (Pause). Did this guy not know that being referred to as monkeys is KINDA a sore spot for African Americans? I mean, I know that…how did none of these cartoon editors not know that?

It’s distasteful and the artist can say whatever he wants about it was a joke about the monkey not our president, that he put the stimulus part in there to make light of the monkey’s behavior, but the truth is that we already get it. We understand what he was trying to say….it just wasn’t funny.

They are remaking 4 untouchable movies. I heard about them in this order. Ohh and you better believe I’m fucking PISSED. The fact that I pay 10 dollars to see a movie – when 95% of the movies offered to me are remakes of old shit – is REALLY starting to grind my gears. If I’m going to pay for something it should sure as hell be an original idea and something exciting. Not “oh when I was little I watched this movie, now I’m going to rape it, jumble the story line so that it appears edgier, add some explosions and digital effects, and then I’m going to resell it as a brand new movie but keep the title of the old one!!” Yeah, you’re talented…talented at being unoriginal.

First: The Karate Kid

So Will Smith wants to put his son in another role that he doesn’t belong in. The fucking Karate Kid?! Seriously?? We’re going to touch that one? Honestly? Why not just make a karate movie of some sort – why does it have to be a remake of the Karate Kid? I’m sorry but I don’t care if its updated and I don’t care if you put the meaning of life somewhere in there – Jackie Chan will NEVER be Pat Morita and he will NEVER be Mr. Miyagi. Personally, I don’t care WHAT kind of issues little Jaden Smith’s character has (no doubt it will be to run away from gangs and drugs!) he will never compare to Ralph Macchio (Daniel LaRusso). They want to set it in Bejing so it can be a bigger blockbuster – the point of the movie was that it was an easy 80’s flick, no INYOURFACEACTION, only fights and training. Needless to say it made me sick to my stomach and I wanted to punch some kids in the face who will no doubt support this movie and not see it for the sick, pathetic sham it is…
and I swear to god if they even UTTER “wax on wax off”…..

Second: Clue.

Gore Verbinski will direct (Pirates of the Carribean) so we can only expect lameness. Ok, I take that back, I liked the first Pirate movie. I’m really not TOO pissed about this one. The first Clue movie was amazing (Thanks Tim Curry and Singing Telegram Girl) and was a classic to watch when I was younger. The difference between this and the others is that its based off of a board game. They wont be redoing the same plot of the first. Apparently Clue just got a whole new revamp so the characters are different with different backgrounds and stories – so who knows it could turn out to be a decent thriller/dark comedy…BUT I DON’T LIKE IT!

Third: IT

So this is all kinds of wrong. IT is Tim Curry – Tim Curry is IT. End of story. You know, I grew up watching this movie once a year at my friend Erin’s house at her birthday party. It was a ritual. Never very scary but always managed to make us squeal each year (the part that gets me is the clown in the blowing sheets at the beginning). I eventually was able to make it through the book which is knee deep with worthless descriptors….Stephen King I hate you. That being said, it was the scariest thing I’ve ever read. The concept of a monster that is what YOU fear the most is just nuts. So whatever, I’d be more open to a remake if they were true to the book (even the old version wasnt) and it was a HUGE blockbuster. If they put the money behind this – oh man, it’d be unstoppable with the money it’d make. Instead guess who is making it? SCI FI! Yeah, so we already know its going to have the WORST graphics ever and that it will be utter and complete crap. Hey Peter Filardi – thanks for taking a SHIT on my childhood…fucking hack.

Fourth and by far the WORST Trespass – The Neverending Story.

I literally have no words except for they WILL fuck this up. When they do, I will burn down a theater. Then I’ll just stand outside screaming “CALL MY NAME SEBASTIAN! PLEASE!!” After I escape narrowly from the cops (or as I like to call them “the nothing”) I will find and roundhouse kick the new Falkor. I’ll tromp through the Swamp of Sadness and I will find G’morks body and resurrect that shit. He’ll lay a hurting on all of Fantasia…seriously though, I’ll do it! The fact that this is what we’ve come back to is upsetting to me. I want to be able to have movies that I can show my children cats when they are old enough to understand it and not have them prefer to see the newer LAMER version!! Why is Hollywood doing this to me?! WHY?!

I hate you hollywood. You and your recycling of classics into pure mediocrity. Congrats.

This interesting article really cleared up a few things for me on how to be a better housewife to my future husband.

Such favorites as:

• Have Dinner Ready.
• Prepare yourself…take 15 mins to get refreshed!
• Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him.
• Clear away the clutter.
• Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by…after all, catering to his comfort will provide YOU with immense personal satisfaction.
• Encourage the children to be quiet.
• Be Happy to see him.
• Listen to him…Let him talk first – remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
• Make the evening his…try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
• Dont greet him with complaints and problems.
• Dont complain if he’s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night! Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
• Make him comfortable…have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
• Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a soothing and pleasant voice.
• Dont ask him questions about his actions or his judgements or integrity. Remember he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
• A good wife always knows her place.

…anyone else notice it started getting a little intense at the end? Start off with easy silly stuff and end it on a high note: Be thankful for your husband, without him you’d surely be a lonely dried up spinster and trust me ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN BEING A SPINSTER!!

Oh! I forgot the the last few bulletins:

• Unclog your ears. Never make your husband repeat a request twice.
• When meeting your husbands mistress (likely his secretary or one of your close friends), do not confront nor embarrass your husband. Remember, he is in control and because he has a penis, he makes the rules.
• Should your insubordination result in bruises, always keep stocked on long sleeve shirts, sunglasses, hats and pants – you wouldn’t want to be embarrassed should anyone see that you obviously couldn’t follow simple instructions!
• When performing “love making” be sure to satisfy all your husband’s needs. Should you begin to feel pleasure yourself – change the position to one that would be more gratifying for him. Surely he doesn’t want to see his wife enjoying herself – he wants to keep her blissfully unaware of what real pleasure is! How else would he keep her trapped in a loveless marriage? To put it short: You would be doing yourself a disservice by servicing yourself.

Crazy bitch and her 14 kids wants your money!! why not?! You should totally pay for their health care, schooling, clothes and food!! I mean, she gave birth to them,  now isnt it the public’s turn to financially support them?!

She’s even whoring the kids pictures out now in hopes for donations.

Anyone who gives that bitch anything is as guilty as she is. Take the kids away now and give them to good loving homes that can afford them and give them STABLE emotional love as well. This bitch is crazy and it makes me SICK to see anything that tries to make her out to be anything other than the crazy psycho she is.

I really hope those children can survive.

Oh and just FYI – Suleman receives food stamps and child disability payments for three of her children, her publicist has confirmed. She told Ann Curry “I’m not receiving help from the government. I’m not trying to expect anything from anybody,” and added that money was “superfluous” and “paper.”

This is after she “didnt get paid” made $300,000 for an interview with Ann.

Yeah fucking right you crazy waste of life. Leave her a message people – tell her how she’s doing everything wrong, that she doesn’t understand the repercussions of her actions and the burden she is putting on everyone but herself. Just read the following for proof of how off this woman is in her head:

Nadya Suleman: I have never thought of Angelina Jolie except the last time I saw one of her movies. I think that was years ago. It is so far away from the place I’m in right now to think of think of any celebrity.

Ann Curry: Have you had your lips done?

Nadya Suleman: No. No.

Ann Curry: I want to give you a chance to answer the criticism on Main Street. Why is it responsible for a single woman without a job with six kids to bring eight more children into this world?

Nadya Suleman: I am responsible. I’ve chosen never to go on welfare. I feel as though it is my responsibility to do what I can to provide for my children.

Nadya points out repeatedly that she’s never taken welfare. But today she confirmed that she’s receiving $490 a month in food stamps.

Nadya Suleman: I’m not living off of any taxpayer money. If I am – if it’s food stamps, it’s a temporary resource. And – we – my family received maybe about a year and a half ago. And during school – and it’s only for food. And I am so reluctant. I – I so look forward to the day when I’m not getting any kind of help with food stamps, which, I believe, will end right when I graduate. Right about a year, a year and a half.

During the time she gave birth to her first six children she went to college and graduate school and stayed home from work and collected disability payments that totaled about $165,000.

Ann Curry: So your only income are your disability payments? Is that where your – what your income is now?

Nadya Suleman: Um. No. My disability stopped.

Ann Curry: Okay.

Nadya Suleman: So it stopped when I was pregnant.

Ann Curry: So do you have any income at all?

Nadya Suleman: At this time, it was just student loans.

Ann Curry: You’re saying that you’re going to use student loans to help raise your children.

Nadya Suleman: Temporarily. Temporarily.

Ann Curry: Do you have any way of paying back these loans?

Nadya Suleman: Yes, when I work, when I’m working.

Ann Curry: How much -

Nadya Suleman: – as a counselor.

Ann Curry: – in debt do you have now?

Nadya Suleman: Probably 50. Close to 50.

Ann Curry: Thousand dollars.

Nadya Suleman: Mmm-hmm.

Ann Curry: How is that not like welfare?

Nadya Suleman: Oh no. These are student loans. You consolidate the loans, you pay it back. We don’t pay back welfare.

50Grand in debt and has 8 more kids. She’s feeding them with STUDENT LOANS! How is no one stepping in?! How is no one helping these kids?

Also, here are pictures of the home those children are forced to live in.

Yeah, now add 8 screaming babies to that already disgusting mess…

Lets also just take note that apparently student loans are covering cosmetic surgery to make her look like Angie Jolie. Because she’s crazypants!

So this guy is in the news because he went to a bar, got drunk, took a bitch home and slept with her.Ok, so not for that. That is what I like to call the “Mating Dance of the Drunkards” and you can see it at any bar ANYWHERE, ANYTIME.

What got these two on the news is that when Wayne Robinson came to from his lovefested valium and booze filled night he realized that his crazy one night stand, Dominique Fisher, had carved not only her name on his arm but doodles all over him. With a knife. While he was sleeping.

Of course he woke up covered in blood with the crazy of crazies sleeping next to him and she was snoring peacefully. She was probably cutting his throat in her dreams. He grabbed his shit and took off only to then file charges.

Fisher was found guilty of one charge of unlawful wounding following a two-day trial. She will be sentenced on February 27 at Preston Crown Court.

Look at that mug, HOTNESS, I wouldn’t cut him up – I’d TIE him up. Oh snap! Not sexually, I mean to a wall in my basement and keep him as a pet. IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN!!

Sizzzzource.

I hate this little 15 year old cunt. She’ll be in rehab by 18 and no one will know who she is by 22 so I’m not toooooooooo worried. I wonder if everyone forgot why her dad stopped being famous after Achey Breaky Heart (which I danced to EVERY night)??? He was a good old fashioned Sean-Connery-style wife beater. I’m sick of people saying how close her family is and blah blah blah they go to church…they’re more like the loco-lohans than you think.

I only post this because everyone sees this picture and starts bashing on her for racism. Seriously people? Is she wearing a costume or saying anything offensive? Oh, you mean she’s just pulling at the corners of her eyes? I guess the Asians own that gesture, huh? FUCK YOU.

I’m totally doing the slanty eyed face now. YOU CANT STOP ME!

I find it all absolutely ridiculous and I’m honestly baffled how the outrage isn’t actually about the fact that EVERYONE IN THIS PHOTO IS STONED. I’ve seen enough people all cheekyeyed to know it when I see it. Lets get on this 15 year old for drug use instead of racism, its a better front to tear her apart. Or how about she’s 15 and fucking a 20 year old? Thats not statutory rape, nah, not if her dad approves. (BULLSHIT) Lets also try not to be bitter about the quality of smoke they probably have. Oh how I hate you people with money and nothing to spend it on but clothes and drugs!

AskMen.com’s Top 99 Most Desirable Women is an annual list compiled by AM readers and staff, ranking the famous females deemed to be the year’s most alluring. Readers are asked to look beyond sex appeal and beauty to pick women who have the characteristics they value in a potential companion, like intelligence, humor, charisma, and ambition. The result is a list that acts as the definitive gauge for identifying what modern men desire most in their female companions.

Uh, yeah – a hot body. Seriously.

Here is a peek at how stupid men are:

Meghann Fox is 2. (“Although just 22 years old, Megan Fox impresses us to no end, from her staggeringly killer body to her daydream-inducing supermodel face.”)
Marissa Miller is 3.
Keeley Hazell is 4. (“(She) comes from a working-class suburb of London and barely finished high school. To most people, that biography would be a precursor to an ordinary career, but she just happens to be blessed with 32DD-26-32 measurements“)
Anne Hathaway is 5.
Scarlet Johannson is 7
Rihanna is 8.
Kristen Bell is 9.
Heidi Klum is 11.
Jessica Alba is 15.
Jessica Biel is 16. (on the site they outright say “her career has gone nowhere” since 7th heaven).
Bianca Beauchamp is 24.
Charlize Theron is 26.
Gisele Bundchen is 28.
Angelina Jolie is 42.
Beyonce is 50.
Aishwara Rai is 60.
Vanessa fucking Hudgens is 61.
Olivia Munn is 62. (Love her)
Audrina Patridge is 68!!!!!!!
Jessica Simpson is 70.
Anna Feris is 78.
Katherine Heigl is 81.
Britney Spears is 90.
Elizabeth Banks is 95.
Tina Fey is 97.
Kate Winslet is 99.

This list is insane. To me its almost backwards except for a few.

- Crazy Britney Spears shouldn’t even touch the list – she does what her daddy tells her to and she isnt even talented but I’ll let that go because she’s 90.
- Kate Winslet gets the snub of being 99 when she could out converse, act and BREATHE half these girls.
- Vanessa Hudgens?? Really??
- Meghan Fox isn’t a bad 2 – Lord knows she cant act but she seems funny and normal and I cant hate her for that.
- Heidi Klum (who is actually ambitious and worth something to the world) and Charlize Theron would be higher on my list. I mean, how is someone who works with the United Nations and a woman who has a multimillion dollar empire passed her modeling career be below a woman who is famous for her FETISH site (B. Beauchamp)?!? That really is more “ambitious” than political involvement and all over class?
- Jessica Miseralba being 15 and Jessica Biel being 16 – both of which the site physically says their careers are dead in the water and its just their looks that keep people interested. They’re only there because they’re hot and personally Charlize and Heidi blow them both out of the water in that aspect too.
- Also to have (dear god I’m going to defend her) Angelina Jolie who is also very well spoken, has half a brain and is involved in world affairs at 42? It just doesn’t make sense.
- And will SOMEONE tell me what Audrinia “I’m the stupidest bitch that ever lived” Patridge was doing on here?! Seriously guys?!

I wouldn’t have an issue with this list if it was put out as a  HOT WOMEN of ‘09 list but the people who did it outright claim it shouldn’t be based off looks. Yet, they constantly discuss the physical attributes of these women (even when they aren’t talented ala ScarJo – I love her to death but we have to be honest here). I was sad to see there were very few athletes (who physically work hard for what they do), no writers, designers or comedians. The top 20 was filled with models, women who are paid to be beautiful and rarely talk. I suppose that when it comes down to it, this just proves that men, no matter what they claim to look for in a woman, prefer her to be sexy over intelligent, skinny over talented and most importantly: the most they want their “potential partner” to contribute to the world is a hot sex scene in a movie or the ability to wear a bikini down a runway.

For fucking shame. (oh and don’t think I don’t know I sound like a fat, ugly, bitter bitch.)

Craziness

I’ll start this out by saying that our freedom of speech and our ability to voice our opinions on any given subject is a beautiful, sacred right. That being said – people like this make me want to allow the government to tell people to shut the fuck up. They turn this:

“Krispy Kreme Doughnuts, Inc. (NYSE: KKD) is honoring American’s sense of pride and freedom of choice on Inauguration Day, by offering a free doughnut of choice to every customer on this historic day, Jan. 20. By doing so, participating Krispy Kreme stores nationwide are making an oath to tasty goodies — just another reminder of how oh-so-sweet ‘free’ can be.”

Into this:

“The unfortunate reality of a post-Roe v. Wade America is that ‘choice’ is synonymous with abortion access, and celebration of ‘freedom of choice’ is a tacit endorsement of abortion rights on demand…President-elect Barack Obama promises to be the most virulently pro-abortion president in history. Millions more children will be endangered by his radical abortion agenda…Celebrating his inauguration with ‘Freedom of Choice’ doughnuts – only two days before the anniversary of the Supreme Court decision to decriminalize abortion – is not only extremely tacky, it’s disrespectful and insensitive and makes a mockery of a national tragedy…A misconstrued concept of ‘choice’ has killed over 50 million preborn children since Jan. 22, 1973. Does Krispy Kreme really want their free doughnuts to celebrate this ‘freedom.’”

Crazies will be crazies but luckily Krispy Kreme didn’t bite to this obvious bait. It’s words, it meant nothing more than the right we all had as Americans to have a choice in who our president was – there was no thought of dead babies, I swear. I dont like how these zealots twist words and turn something wonderful (although me thinks this has to do with the fact that they probably aren’t too happy about Obama being elected in the first place) into something absolutely stupid.

Shut up, go back to church and let me eat my fetus covered donuts in peace.
Too far?

Source.

So in “he’s a genius” news -

On January 11th 2005 Gurdeep Kaur was struck by a car and killed while crossing the street to her house. The driver sped off and police found no skid marks. The police were able to know that the car was a Jaguar and was either a XJ6 or XJ8 built between 1995 and 2003 based on debris at the scene.

Their public plea for leads lead them to the home of Lee Harbert, an investment banker with a history of 3 DUIs. He had a Jag that had been recently cleaned but the police found body damage and one of the dead woman’s earrings in the windshield well. Needless to say they knew Harbert committed the crime – they didn’t however know if he violated the law by not stopping to help the person he struck with his car. Harbert claimed he thought he hit a deer.

“And I looked…down the road, I looked immediately northbound, because I knew whatever had struck the car was large. I had no idea at the time what it was. God forbid that it was a person. Whether it was a large animal or… not… I didn’t know.”

What could have ended up as a his story/their story didn’t thanks to an Internet search database. While searching Harbert’s house they checked out his computer and found evidence of Google searches a few days after the accident for terms such as “auto glass reporting requirements to law enforcement,” “auto glass, Las Vegas,” “auto parts, auto theft, and the Moraga Police Department.” He allegedly also searched for “hit-and-run,” which led him to a Web page dealing with the death of Kaur that said police had a lead on the vehicle.

Harbert was sentenced to 3 years in prison for his offense.

Yes, three years is totally worth the life of an innocent woman. I hope he fucking rots.

Source.