Great news for MY CHUBBYBUTT!

It’s official. Thinking.Makes.You.Fat.

So some really weird guy noticed that every time he started working on grants – he got a craving for cookies. I say he’s just a doughboy, but apparently now science is backing him up…well HIS science anyways.

Apparently he has a lab and he figured out that when performing mental tasks (such as solving problems on the computer, math problems, etc) stimulates the appetite. This causes people to eat significantly more calories while “thinking” than they would otherwise being “lazy and stupid.”


In a more in depth study researchers found that doing mental work actually wonks up your levels of insulin and glucose which in turn make you feel hungry. The brain is the culprit, demanding more glucose so it can solve those quadratic equations (or in your mother’s case – tying her shoes or spelling her name).

“At this point, however, the study indicates that a rapidly changing lifestyle toward “knowledge-based work,” like time spent at the computer or trying to solve mental challenges, may be a significant factor in the current obesity epidemic, Chaput said.”There are a lot of people doing this kind of work now, compared to physical work in the past, so we postulate that it can explain in part” why so many people in so many countries are getting fat, he said.”

I know that when I went from running around a clothing store and restaurant to sitting at a desk 8 hours a day – I gained 15 pounds. I mean seriously guys, I get that it supposedly makes you consume more calories…but couldnt it just be that you aren’t expending as many calories by sitting on your butt thinking? Sounds like a lard large coverup to me. Can we just use one ounce of common sense here, rather than explain away an epidemic through silly studies?? “Oh look at Mary – she’s gained 40 pounds…she must be taking that last semester of LATIN!! HAR HAR!”

Wait! All this time I had thought I was expanding because I’m a fatass when really I just perform WAY TOO MANY knowledge based activities!! Oh my god. Does me being big boned mean that I’m smarter than every skinny bitch that walks the earth?! OH PLEASE GOD SAY YES!!!

I like science.

because i know you care


~ by Mathy Shoots People on September 24, 2008.

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